Begining to Marathon

So I'm kinda done talking about drinking for a while. I just sick of thinking about it and mulling it over in my mind. You would think after 9 months I would be past all the poor me stages and moved on to how INCREDIBLY GREAT I feel. Which I love, but I would also love to....occasionally.....sit and have a glass of wine and enjoy the end of the day as well, which I miss most of all. So we are going to move on to my next focus

So lets flash back to the beginning of the year.........

January 1st I set some goals one being loosing weight. I was hoping to drop down to 165 by March. Well that didn't happen. While I'm still really close.....only 4 pounds to go on a bad day and 3 pounds on a good day. It has proved to be harder than I thought. My metabolism was wrecked due to drinking. Cross training and diet have proven to be very effective in the last few months. I am inches away from a 10. I can fit into a 10 just not quite comfortable yet. With this last bit of weight and cross training my legs are feeling strong.

My other goal was to complete the Walt Disney World Goofy Challenge. I was really hoping to be healed and my mileage a lot higher (an easy 13 miles under my belt). Well, I'm starting off behind the eight ball with only an 8 mile base and my heel is only "sore" on a good day. But this is my goal and I'm not finishing the year until I'm holding at least 2 medals in my hand from the Half Marathon and the Full Marathon. In order to hold the all three I have to finish the Marathon in 5 hours. Which if I was totally healed, this conversation would not even be note worthy. However.......we will need to see if the stars will align for me or at what breaking point will I reach in Pain tolerance. I made it through two labors and delivery so I'm thinking how bad can this be.

This is the final stage of my first year of sobriety. 16 weeks, 517 training miles, 32 hours of strength training will hopefully get me these 3 Medals...........
 

                    

Haven't written in a while but I'm still here.

I can't remember the last post. It's not that I don't need to post or don't think about drinking. It's unfortunately in my thoughts everyday. I think I'm hitting that next phase of "is this really for the rest of life?" I continue to questions why me? Why do I have to be different. There are so many things that come easy for me or with work I can achieve, so why does this obstacle hang in front of me like a giant swinging pendant ready to knock off my narrow bridge.

Fall is my favorite time of year. I love the smells and the feeling of cold coming. Warmth, comfort and the colors of Fall surround me. While I was shopping the other day, I walked past a new beer from Bridgeport Brewing. It was called Wicked a seasonal beer laced with spice. I felt a jump of excitement and out of habit I reached for it suddenly realizing I couldn't take it home. The utter disappointment at the moment was disheartening. Some one could have slapped me and it would have had less impact then that feeling of disappointment.

Try, want, just a little, one glass, why me, is on an endless play list in my head. The summer wasn't as hard as I thought it was going to be, but this fall is going to prove a little more challenging.

8 months, 11 days